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It’s always a privilege when I get to speak to the rising generation about self belief, hope and personal perspective. And the setting was incredible! 💯
When my son passed away at 15 years old after a 17 month battle with cancer I learned about long goodbyes.
After my father passed away suddenly and unexpectedly in March I learned about no goodbyes.
So, today, especially today, I wanted to share this chapter from my book about goodbyes.
Will they know?
After my father passed away suddenly and unexpectedly in March I learned about no goodbyes.
So, today, especially today, I wanted to share this chapter from my book about goodbyes.
Will they know?
If not now, when?
One of the biggest hits to self confidence is not achieving goals we set for ourselves, and the driving force behind not achieving those goals is how we set or fail to set them.
A big mistake made in setting goals is making a statement “I want to lose 30 lbs,” and that’s it. Then when you don’t hit that “goal” your self confidence takes a hit and self loathing starts while you’re eating a double cheese burger with extra large fries and a shake.
The reality is “I want to lose 30 lbs” isn’t a goal - it’s a wish. You haven’t established the basics to get you there. Build goals that are specific and build confidence. Create your roadmap.
Break your goals down into steps and the action you will take and by when.
Think about what roadblocks you might encounter and how you will counteract them.
And…in the day and age of “I can’t remember the last time I picked up a pencil and wrote anything…”
WRITE DOWN YOUR GOALS!!!!
Have your goals with you at all times. Read them and go get it!
One of the biggest hits to self confidence is not achieving goals we set for ourselves, and the driving force behind not achieving those goals is how we set or fail to set them.
A big mistake made in setting goals is making a statement “I want to lose 30 lbs,” and that’s it. Then when you don’t hit that “goal” your self confidence takes a hit and self loathing starts while you’re eating a double cheese burger with extra large fries and a shake.
The reality is “I want to lose 30 lbs” isn’t a goal - it’s a wish. You haven’t established the basics to get you there. Build goals that are specific and build confidence. Create your roadmap.
Break your goals down into steps and the action you will take and by when.
Think about what roadblocks you might encounter and how you will counteract them.
And…in the day and age of “I can’t remember the last time I picked up a pencil and wrote anything…”
WRITE DOWN YOUR GOALS!!!!
Have your goals with you at all times. Read them and go get it!
Too often we condemn ourselves for past failures or mistakes, to the point that it holds us back from progressing and becoming the person we long to be.
Let go and move forward with optimism, confidence and an eye toward the person you want to become.
Who you were is far less important than whom you are becoming. Don’t let that voice inside tell you that you can’t.
Let go and move forward with optimism, confidence and an eye toward the person you want to become.
Who you were is far less important than whom you are becoming. Don’t let that voice inside tell you that you can’t.
“It really is amazing how life can change in one day.”
Dwight Schrute
Dwight Schrute
Being positive about your life and circumstances doesn’t always come naturally.
The path of least resistance sometimes leads to negativity.
If you find yourself struggling in that area it takes a concerted effort to choose optimism.
It may come unnatural at first, but with consistent effort you can create a path of least resistance that leads to positivity.
If you find yourself thinking negatively about yourself or circumstance - stop, rethink, and reframe. Teach yourself to think positively. 💯
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#positivevibes #positivethinking #selflove #selfcare #selfcaretips #hope #courage #strength #utah #motivation #motivational
The path of least resistance sometimes leads to negativity.
If you find yourself struggling in that area it takes a concerted effort to choose optimism.
It may come unnatural at first, but with consistent effort you can create a path of least resistance that leads to positivity.
If you find yourself thinking negatively about yourself or circumstance - stop, rethink, and reframe. Teach yourself to think positively. 💯
.
.
.
.
.
#positivevibes #positivethinking #selflove #selfcare #selfcaretips #hope #courage #strength #utah #motivation #motivational
Be successful at things that matter!
In order to do that you must align what is most important to you with your actions - do they mirror what is important to you or are they at odds?
Once they are aligned you will find your true success.
In order to do that you must align what is most important to you with your actions - do they mirror what is important to you or are they at odds?
Once they are aligned you will find your true success.
Ten months before Tyler passed away from brain cancer, we were at a candlelight vigil for his friend Katie.
In so many ways Katie was his hope. She was in remission when he was diagnosed. He looked to her and hoped for her miracle that would lead to his.
It didn’t come.
A small flame passed from one candle to the next I looked down to see the Tyler’s tear-moistened eye.
I knelt to be at his side. The glow of the candlelight was growing above us. With the glow of the flame on his cheeks, I was overcome with the light even during this difficult time. I was overcome with love and admiration for Tyler and all that he taught me.
I was overcome with the warmth of our Savior and the light He brings to the world.
I was overcome by the eternal nature of family and God’s plan of happiness.
I was overcome with hope. I was overcome by the light.
When I stood and looked up, all I could see was darkness. When I got on my knees and again looked up, I could see the light. It was a simple yet profound lesson.
When we are overcome with darkness, we need to kneel down to see the light. It’s all around us. The light is always there and hope is always there, even when you are surrounded by darkness.
In so many ways Katie was his hope. She was in remission when he was diagnosed. He looked to her and hoped for her miracle that would lead to his.
It didn’t come.
A small flame passed from one candle to the next I looked down to see the Tyler’s tear-moistened eye.
I knelt to be at his side. The glow of the candlelight was growing above us. With the glow of the flame on his cheeks, I was overcome with the light even during this difficult time. I was overcome with love and admiration for Tyler and all that he taught me.
I was overcome with the warmth of our Savior and the light He brings to the world.
I was overcome by the eternal nature of family and God’s plan of happiness.
I was overcome with hope. I was overcome by the light.
When I stood and looked up, all I could see was darkness. When I got on my knees and again looked up, I could see the light. It was a simple yet profound lesson.
When we are overcome with darkness, we need to kneel down to see the light. It’s all around us. The light is always there and hope is always there, even when you are surrounded by darkness.
I've thought long and hard about this one. I firmly believe our Heavenly Father has a plan for us; I trust in the Lord. I also believe we have been given agency to act and make decisions for ourselves.
If you have ever been through the fire, I am sure you have been told or even told yourself everything happens for a reason.
After Tyler died, this never brought me comfort. For me, this statement somehow suggested that I could passively wait for a reason to appear - that nothing was required of me. I believe the opposite to be true.
If we are to find meaning in the fires we all face - loss of a loved one, business failures, financial collapse, sickness, and on and on - we must make our reason.
We must act and not be acted upon. When you emerge from the refiner's fire, the decision is yours how you will respond and what you will do with your refined life.
I refuse to believe that the "reason" we go through the fire is to become bitter, angry, and live an unfulfilled life, but how often is that the result? It can be a tough road to the "reason," I am living proof of that, but it's one we must travel.
I will repeat my three things once more: 1. Uncommon self-belief 2. Undying hope 3. Brighter perspective = finding your reason.
Find your reason.
Feel free to download the I Am More app and take a self-assessment in each area. Link in bio.
If you have ever been through the fire, I am sure you have been told or even told yourself everything happens for a reason.
After Tyler died, this never brought me comfort. For me, this statement somehow suggested that I could passively wait for a reason to appear - that nothing was required of me. I believe the opposite to be true.
If we are to find meaning in the fires we all face - loss of a loved one, business failures, financial collapse, sickness, and on and on - we must make our reason.
We must act and not be acted upon. When you emerge from the refiner's fire, the decision is yours how you will respond and what you will do with your refined life.
I refuse to believe that the "reason" we go through the fire is to become bitter, angry, and live an unfulfilled life, but how often is that the result? It can be a tough road to the "reason," I am living proof of that, but it's one we must travel.
I will repeat my three things once more: 1. Uncommon self-belief 2. Undying hope 3. Brighter perspective = finding your reason.
Find your reason.
Feel free to download the I Am More app and take a self-assessment in each area. Link in bio.
This one tends to be a tough for many - old or young. Social media can be a blessing and a curse. To be able to remain in the lives of the people you love despite distance is a blessing, but there is a huge downside if not kept in proper perspective.
We are not the same. We are meant to be different and that is ok, in fact, it’s more than ok. Each of us has unique talents, abilities, and paths. Never allow your path to be confused with another. Find joy in your living not despair in your wanting.
#bemorenow
We are not the same. We are meant to be different and that is ok, in fact, it’s more than ok. Each of us has unique talents, abilities, and paths. Never allow your path to be confused with another. Find joy in your living not despair in your wanting.
#bemorenow
When you go through the darkness like our family did during my sons battle with terminal cancer, you learn a lot about people.
Some friends stay by your side through the ugly while others faded away, and new friends seemed to appear out of nowhere.
One of those that appeared for me is my “brother,” Pascal.
At the time Pascal was a professional hockey player moving all over the world and had no reason to get involved in our fight other than the goodness in his heart.
Pascal loved Tyler and Tyler loved him. After Tyler died Pascal helped me see the light again. He believed in me and what the new me had to offer the world.
He helped build me up again and prepare me for the next chapter of my life. He knew Tyler’s heart and of my desire to continue to build the legacy he left behind.
While the impact I may be having is small - it is much bigger than it would have been without my friend and his guidance and belief in me.
My point is this - make sure you surround yourself with people that build you up, not tear you down. If you want to be inspiring associate with inspiring people. If you want to be successful - whatever that means to you - surround yourself with people that are successful.
If you are lucky you will find your Pascal. Thank you brother.
Some friends stay by your side through the ugly while others faded away, and new friends seemed to appear out of nowhere.
One of those that appeared for me is my “brother,” Pascal.
At the time Pascal was a professional hockey player moving all over the world and had no reason to get involved in our fight other than the goodness in his heart.
Pascal loved Tyler and Tyler loved him. After Tyler died Pascal helped me see the light again. He believed in me and what the new me had to offer the world.
He helped build me up again and prepare me for the next chapter of my life. He knew Tyler’s heart and of my desire to continue to build the legacy he left behind.
While the impact I may be having is small - it is much bigger than it would have been without my friend and his guidance and belief in me.
My point is this - make sure you surround yourself with people that build you up, not tear you down. If you want to be inspiring associate with inspiring people. If you want to be successful - whatever that means to you - surround yourself with people that are successful.
If you are lucky you will find your Pascal. Thank you brother.
Life can change in an instant, with or without your permission. What remains entirely in your power is the willingness to change your perspective as you look to your horizon and seek a new and brighter view.
If you do, areas of your life will be illuminated that you may have never seen.
Secret and amazing facets of your life that somehow remained hidden will step from the shadows and into the light.
Yes, life may look different, but different can still be amazing.
If you do, areas of your life will be illuminated that you may have never seen.
Secret and amazing facets of your life that somehow remained hidden will step from the shadows and into the light.
Yes, life may look different, but different can still be amazing.
Comparison is a thief that steals confidence and joy.
We are constantly reminded that our lives are not as “good” or as “pretty” as those we follow. We are fooled into believing that we are somehow less.
One of the hardest questions my son, Tyler, asked me during his battle with terminal brain cancer was, “Dad, what’s the survival rate?” What do you tell a 13 year old boy when the answer is 0%?
I believe the answer I gave him applies to each of us during our times of trial, self doubt and debilitating comparison, “It doesn’t matter. A survival rate is a statistic about people that came before you. There never has been and never will be another person like you. So, why would you ever compare yourself to anyone else? You have been qualified from the day you were born to overcome the challenges in your life and find joy.”
The same is true for all of us. We each have our own unique talents and abilities that are vastly different than others but perfect for ourselves. We just need to recognize them and be confident in who we are and not unconfident because of who we are not.
You might have to work on growing the confidence that you are enough. Some may need to work harder than others because we have been so critical of ourselves that we have become chronically unconfident.
Try this - write down 5 reasons why you are good enough today.
Then write down 5 reasons why you deserve more than you are giving yourself.
You are exactly who you are supposed to be - uniquely you and uniquely qualified to overcome and have joy.
We are constantly reminded that our lives are not as “good” or as “pretty” as those we follow. We are fooled into believing that we are somehow less.
One of the hardest questions my son, Tyler, asked me during his battle with terminal brain cancer was, “Dad, what’s the survival rate?” What do you tell a 13 year old boy when the answer is 0%?
I believe the answer I gave him applies to each of us during our times of trial, self doubt and debilitating comparison, “It doesn’t matter. A survival rate is a statistic about people that came before you. There never has been and never will be another person like you. So, why would you ever compare yourself to anyone else? You have been qualified from the day you were born to overcome the challenges in your life and find joy.”
The same is true for all of us. We each have our own unique talents and abilities that are vastly different than others but perfect for ourselves. We just need to recognize them and be confident in who we are and not unconfident because of who we are not.
You might have to work on growing the confidence that you are enough. Some may need to work harder than others because we have been so critical of ourselves that we have become chronically unconfident.
Try this - write down 5 reasons why you are good enough today.
Then write down 5 reasons why you deserve more than you are giving yourself.
You are exactly who you are supposed to be - uniquely you and uniquely qualified to overcome and have joy.
If you had five minutes left to speak what would you say?
If you had five minutes left to teach your children one last lesson what would it be?
If you had five minutes left to summarize what you accomplished in your life what would you say?
I believe that for each of us only the most important messages and aspects of our lives would make into those last precious five minutes - only the important things.
My dad taught me that you should have goals in life, both personal and professional, and he is right. If you don’t know where you’re going any road will get you there.
For me the ultimate impact of these goals may not actually be the achieving of the goal itself – rather it will be all the small steps along that way that guided your decisions in attempting to reach that goal.
What would happen to your life if you decided your goals, both personal and professional, must be worthy of your last “five minutes”?
How would it change your life?
What would happen to your life if you had to qualify each big decision with “will it make it in my last five minutes?”
Just before my 15 year old son, Tyler, took his last labored breath I whispered my last “five minutes” into his ear. I only spoke the important things. Nothing else mattered. Nothing.
If you had five minutes left to speak what would you say?
If you had five minutes left to teach your children one last lesson what would it be?
If you had five minutes left to summarize what you accomplished in your life what would you say?
I believe that for each of us only the most important messages and aspects of our lives would make into those last precious five minutes - only the important things.
My dad taught me that you should have goals in life, both personal and professional, and he is right. If you don’t know where you’re going any road will get you there.
For me the ultimate impact of these goals may not actually be the achieving of the goal itself – rather it will be all the small steps along that way that guided your decisions in attempting to reach that goal.
What would happen to your life if you decided your goals, both personal and professional, must be worthy of your last “five minutes”?
How would it change your life?
What would happen to your life if you had to qualify each big decision with “will it make it in my last five minutes?”
Just before my 15 year old son, Tyler, took his last labored breath I whispered my last “five minutes” into his ear. I only spoke the important things. Nothing else mattered. Nothing.
If you had five minutes left to speak what would you say?
I believe we carry too much mental baggage and false assumptions about ourselves.
We lead with “why I can’t” instead of “why I can.” We let past failures dictate a future negative response before we have even given ourselves a chance at success.
We need to recognize the past with an eye toward making ourselves stronger, not to reconfirm or enlarge our weaknesses.
Ask yourself, “How often do I recognize my strengths compared to how often do I recognize my weaknesses?” For many of us I am afraid we focus on the negative not the positive, or we lead with our weaknesses.
We must lead with our strengths.
The first step in becoming “more” is recognizing that you are more! Lead with your strengths - give yourself a chance to succeed before you sabotage your own success with self defeating thoughts.
If you lead with your strengths and not your weaknesses, you will learn that you are more than you think you are.
If you struggle with this and find it difficult to truly believe in yourself, download my “I Am More” app and complete the section called “Uncommon Self Belief” and work toward seeing yourself as MORE!
We lead with “why I can’t” instead of “why I can.” We let past failures dictate a future negative response before we have even given ourselves a chance at success.
We need to recognize the past with an eye toward making ourselves stronger, not to reconfirm or enlarge our weaknesses.
Ask yourself, “How often do I recognize my strengths compared to how often do I recognize my weaknesses?” For many of us I am afraid we focus on the negative not the positive, or we lead with our weaknesses.
We must lead with our strengths.
The first step in becoming “more” is recognizing that you are more! Lead with your strengths - give yourself a chance to succeed before you sabotage your own success with self defeating thoughts.
If you lead with your strengths and not your weaknesses, you will learn that you are more than you think you are.
If you struggle with this and find it difficult to truly believe in yourself, download my “I Am More” app and complete the section called “Uncommon Self Belief” and work toward seeing yourself as MORE!
The more you learn about people the more you realize everyone faces headwinds.
Some are approaching the eye of the storm, some are in the midst of it and some are in the aftermath.
Regardless of where you stand, it’s important to remember that YOU get to decide what you become...you have the power and strength to forge a path of new meaning, but you have to take control. You are more than you believe you are...👊🏼.
#bemorenow
Some are approaching the eye of the storm, some are in the midst of it and some are in the aftermath.
Regardless of where you stand, it’s important to remember that YOU get to decide what you become...you have the power and strength to forge a path of new meaning, but you have to take control. You are more than you believe you are...👊🏼.
#bemorenow
There are times when it seems the harder you try the worse it gets.
I have been there…a lot.
I feel that we all inherently know it’s important to serve others, but I think the most important lesson and the greatest value is gained when you are in this vicious cycle of things getting worse rather than better.
That is your time. Your time to give.
Sometimes to courageous you must help someone else find their courage.
Sometimes to be hopeful you must help someone else find hope.
When you need to be lifted, pick someone else up and they will pull you up with them.
I have been there…a lot.
I feel that we all inherently know it’s important to serve others, but I think the most important lesson and the greatest value is gained when you are in this vicious cycle of things getting worse rather than better.
That is your time. Your time to give.
Sometimes to courageous you must help someone else find their courage.
Sometimes to be hopeful you must help someone else find hope.
When you need to be lifted, pick someone else up and they will pull you up with them.
How are you doing with your personal “Supply and Demand”? 🤔
Far too often we undermine our own efforts by comparing them to the achievements of others.
Comparison will rob you of joy and progression. All of us are on a path but are at various check points along that path. Some are just beginning and some are further down the road. The only progression that is relevant is your own.
Recognize and celebrate your victories regardless of size. Build confidence along the way and never fall victim to the thief of comparison. 👊🏼
Comparison will rob you of joy and progression. All of us are on a path but are at various check points along that path. Some are just beginning and some are further down the road. The only progression that is relevant is your own.
Recognize and celebrate your victories regardless of size. Build confidence along the way and never fall victim to the thief of comparison. 👊🏼
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